Tonight’s blog was fueled by a glass of 2005 Robert Mondavi Cabernet Sauvignon from Napa Valley. This is one of my favorite wines – velvety and smooth with flavors of blackberry, mocha and spice. At about $25 a bottle, it is better than many wines twice the cost. I found it at my new favorite wine place in Eagle. It’s called Seasons, and I already have my chosen seat.
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Today’s Cabernet
Tonight’s blog was fueled by a glass of 2005 Q Cabernet Sauvignon from Sonoma County. This rich, inexpensive wine is a pleasant staple to have on hand. It costs $18 a bottle, but this week Albertsons has it on sale for $11. You better stock up now for summer barbecues. Invite some buddies and kick back with grilled steaks, green salad, a platter of veggies and a glass (or two) of Q. Mmmmm, good!
Midlife Cabernet: How to Avoid the Pending Doom of Civilization
If we only relied upon the gruesome stories and gloomy reports in the media, most of us would trade our good silver for canned goods and a case of wine and then escape to a private bunker in the wilderness. We have visions of becoming the leather-clad, weapon-wielding character of Tina Turner in Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome. But most of us could never bend over long enough to fix all the laces and latches on those boots!
Before you feel the pressure to exchange your designer purses for backpacks and trade the cutlery set for Bowie knives, try turning off the news, shutting down the alarmists web sites, and closing the negative magazines. Unplug and walk away from paranoid and exaggerated pessimism that seems to seep like a toxic sludge from every media outlet. Use that time to focus on and participate in all the positive activities in your community and country.
There are volunteer organizations that right now are helping kids learn to read, taking hot meals to lonely senior citizens, building homes for low income families, and assisting special needs children go to school. There are unsung heroes who bring casseroles to widows, donate blood to the local blood bank, and rock sick babies in intensive care. Others are writing inspiring books, composing valiant symphonies, and singing new songs of freedom.
These people don’t make the news. They don’t march in the streets or threaten lawsuits. But they walk among us sharing random acts of goodness. Every day. The next time you have the urge to give up on society and curse the darkness, light a candle and find a cause. And keep the silver.
Not Your Mother’s Tea Party
There’s a saying about how a woman is like a tea bag – she doesn’t know how strong she is until she gets into hot water. I recently attended a tea party with a dozen really strong middle-aged women. We sat in a friend’s garden sipping tea from her mother’s ornate tea set. We all used to work for the same corporation and as our lives have evolved most of us are still jumping in and out of hot water when we should be lolling around on the patio receiving a massage from a bodybuilder named Thor.Linda was recently widowed after her husband died unexpectedly. Determined to take care of herself, she closed up their Arizona home and drove by herself back to Idaho. She arrived at 1:30 in the morning, only to discover she didn’t have the key to open the door. “It was always HIS job to do that!” she explained. Exhausted after the 13-hour drive, she did what any resourceful woman would do. She took a hammer and broke down the door. “It felt great!” she said. “I got rid of a lot of pain.”Sue described how she was petitioning the court for guardianship of her teenage granddaughter. “We were all set to enjoy our retirement,” she said. “Now we have a teenager in the house.” After listening to the circumstances, we agreed that we would take the same actions if faced with a similar situation. Molly announced that she was resigning from her job. After working for 34 years, she was planning her retirement. We toasted her with vanilla tea and poppyseed cake. A few women described the challenges of caring for a sick parent. We traded suggestions, anecdotes, and recommended care facilities. One woman was eagerly anticipating the birth of her first grandchild. The other grandmothers in the group all chimed in on the wonders of being a grandmother. Of course, we all pulled out photographs and declared that the world would be a better place because of our perfect progeny.Another woman told about being diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. We encouraged her to take care of herself and then we arm-wrestled her to remove the cookies from her reach.For over twenty years, we’ve shared the highs and lows of our interesting and varied lives. Sometimes it takes a cozy tea party in an elegant garden to renew our spirits before returning to the real world for the next challenge. As we left the party, we all vowed to carry a hammer, just in case we had to bust down a door.
Today’s Cabernet
Today’s blog was fueled by a glass of 2004 Moon Mountain Estate Reserve Cabernet Sauvignon from Sonoma Valley. A luscious and elegant blend of Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Merlot, Malbec and Petit Verdot, this wine offers aromas of mountain blackberry and flavors of cedar and roasted coffee. At $30 a bottle, it’s a little on the high end for every day wine, but I just read that red wine is good for Type 2 Diabetes, so I must have it for medicinal reasons. The article stated that 1/2 glass of red wine helps to lower blood sugar levels. Of course, my glass is a quart jar, so 1/2 glass is just right.
Midlife Cabernet: Blending the Family Frappé
Organizing an event with blended families requires the logistical coordination of air traffic controllers with the precision of a computerized dispatcher and the help of a licensed counselor. Uniting yours, mine, ours, and theirs becomes a calculated strategy that turns dates on the calendar into targets for negotiation. There’s a reason we never saw the ex-families on the television show The Brady Bunch.
I grew up in a small community during a time when couples married, had children, and stayed married until they died. Our family gatherings often included more than 30 people – and done were divorced. There was minimal tactical planning required to schedule an event. Times have changed, and sometimes I feel the pressure to make sure everyone is happy. I need to get over that.
At a recent family dinner, we arranged for the step-grandkids to join us along with the step-children and assorted step-grandparents. When most of the grandparents and parents have been divorced and remarried, it’s time to stop with the titles. There’s no more “step” because “family” will do just fine.
Both my children married spouses who already had children. That made me an instant grandma, a position I enjoy and welcome. I have been divorced and then married a man with grown children who became new members of the family. At our children’s events, the other parent is often involved. At my step-son’s high school graduation, I sat next to his mother. At my daughter’s wedding, her father and I both walked her down the aisle, even though we were divorced. We do it for our children. Even the receiving line was fun because our daughter’s happiness was most important.
No one is advocating divorce, but it happens. I admire those parents who negotiate joint custody arrangements using common sense. Holiday and birthday parties are less stressful if the parents coordinate plans and speak without assaulting each other. And, what child wouldn’t want to be spoiled and adored by one of eight different grandparents?
