Marianne Williamson wrote a wonderful ceremony to celebrate a woman’s passage to and through midlife. How about calling your women friends together to experience the following ritual? Ceremony of the Elder: A Rite of MidlifeBy Marianne WilliamsonAs a generation, we are growing into our wisdom. We are hungry for our wise women, our wise men. We are hungry to know them and to become them. The wise have seen the light at the center of things, and the light at the center of things is who we are. Until we see that, the mission of our lives remains unfulfilled.This rite is very significant when done for someone’s fiftieth, sixtieth, or seventieth birthday. It should also be noted that it is as appropriate for men as it is for women.OFFICIANT: We gather on this day to celebrate an important passage in the life of (name). She is to us a beloved child of God. She is as well the daughter of (name) and (name), the wife of (name), the mother of (names), and sister to the world.The years of her life on earth have brought her to this sacred moment, where she takes upon herself, through the grace of God, the mantle of the Elder. From this day forward, she celebrates and carries forth the purpose of the wise ones, who oversee our human progress, who nurture and sustain us. She shall be grandmother to all children, handmaiden to God and Goddess, revered for her insights and honored for her knowledge.To you, (name), having lived these years, having seen what you have seen and cried the tears of troubled times, we now acknowledge that you have climbed the ladder of the elder ones. May God reveal to you a sacred sensibility. We are blessed by your presence. We are grateful to know you.Please reveal to us your story.(The honoree then tells a prepared story of her life, a letter to the world. It describes her history however she cares to reveal it. She forgives and blesses past times. She offers herself for continued service to humanity and to the world. She claims the full blessings of her maturity, the value of her experience to now share in faith and inspiration with those who seek her counsel.)
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Today’s Cabernet
I’m sitting here enjoying a glass of 2005 Ferrari-Carano Cabernet Sauvignon from Alexander Valley. This wine is always yummy with rich flavors black currant, cherry, and anise. It’s about $27 a bottle and worth every sip.
So Happy about Happiness Article
http://www.balancemagazine.com/magazines/CurrentIssue.pdf
If you copy and paste the above link you can read the current issue of Balance Magazine. It’s a national publication that promotes personal growth for women. My article, Genuine Happiness – Finding Joy in a Grumpy World, is on page 68.
Midlife Cabernet: Do You Cook a Signature Dish?
Chicken parmesan is my family’s favorite meal, and I tackle the process like a woman obsessed. The ritual never varies: First, everyone must leave the kitchen. Then I tie on an apron and continue with the most important task: I open a bottle of red wine. The experience won’t be a success without that important step, and I am under pressure to produce another stellar recipe so who am I to alter the technique?
Then I assemble all the ingredients and take a sip of wine. For the sauce, I sauté fresh onions, red peppers, green peppers, and garlic in extra-virgin olive oil (imported from Italy, of course.) Then I add tomato sauce and let it simmer. The delightful aroma causes Studley to peek into the kitchen but I shoo him away and take another sip of wine.
Then I cut up fresh chicken, dip it in a raw egg mixture, roll it in Italian bread crumbs and shredded fresh parmesan cheese and brown the pieces in olive oil. It takes several pans to brown all the chicken, so I take a few more sips of wine while it cooks. By this time, spattered oil covers the stove, the counters, and my apron. The wine is getting better, so I really don’t care.
Then I spread the simmered sauce into casserole dishes followed by the chicken and layers of sauce, shredded mozzarella cheese, grated parmesan cheese, and more sauce. I cover the pans with tin foil and slide them into an oven heated to 350 degrees for about 45 minutes. Then I sit down to sip wine and ignore the mountain of dirty pans, greasy utensils, empty cheese containers, and spilled bread crumbs that make my kitchen resemble a bad day at an Italian mess hall. It’s usually cleaned up before midnight.
Chicken parmesan tastes better the next day after all the flavors have mingled and the dish has cooled and then reheated. For a splendid dinner, I serve it with more sauce, crusty bread, a vegetable dish, and a green salad. For some reason, the original bottle of wine usually is empty, but there will be another one. For a brief moment at dinner time, all is right with the world.
Today’s Cabernet
Tonight’s blog was fueled by a glass of 2001 Col Solare Red Wine from Columbia Valley. This was another fabulous find at Costco. I only purchased two because it was $39 a bottle, but it was gone when I returned to purchase more. Next time, I’ll pass on the 50-roll pack of toilet paper and get more wine.
Midlife Cabernet: My Life as a Buffoon
Yesterday I attended an important strategy meeting at an upscale restaurant with two other businesswomen. During the meal, I accidentally knocked over a glass of wine, soaking my papers, my Ipad, the tablecloth, and the menus. The women continued to discuss the agenda as we calmly moved to another table. My inevitable clumsiness came as no surprise.
I don’t intentionally plan to cause havoc, mayhem, and disruptive behavior, but I’ve been cursed with the exceptional ability to stumble, sprain, break, bruise, and choke my way through life with consistent proficiency. A few true examples show pathetic proof of my accident prone existence:
I broke my foot a few weeks before my son’s wedding so I had to wear a huge black boot. So I covered it with jewels and danced all night.
On a business trip to the east coast for Boise Cascade, I sprained my ankle and tore ligaments and the injury required a visit to the emergency room so it was reported to Workers Comp. My boss was furious because the accident impacted our department’s safety record.
Once I threw a stick to a dog and a splinter impaled a nerve in my finger. My hand swelled and turned black and I needed regular transfusions to battle the ensuing infection. My arm had to be tied above my head on my bedframe, and now my finger remains crooked.
In 2000, I was the Commencement Speaker for the University of Idaho. On the day of the speech, I developed laryngitis. My voice sounded like James Earl Jones doing phone sex.
I was gallantly attempting a high impact exercise class with women half my age and I tripped over some hand weights, resulting in more torn ligaments.
I was the keynote speaker at a large banquet but right before it was my turn to speak I choked on a piece of chicken. The audience waited patiently while I coughed up the offending food, caught my breath, dried my watering eyes, burped, sneezed, and then stood to speak.
One late afternoon when I was skiing at Sun Valley, I flew off the side of a steep trail and landed in a tree on the far side of the mountain. By the time I could unstrap my gear and crawl down, the lift was closed. I had to catch the employee bus into town and then take another bus back to the ski resort where my friends and the Ski Patrol were frantically searching for me. My friends never skied with me again.
Instead of focusing on the negative reality of being awkward, I try to appreciate the positive aspects of surviving any day without calamity or an accident. I have another important business event this weekend and my goal is to go 48 hours without some catastrophe. If I can make it, my friends will be so excited they’ll bring me some wine – in a sippy cup with a lid.
Today’s blog was fueled by a Sabastiani Cabernet, a robust wine from Sonoma County. It’s about $55 a bottle at Bonefish Grill in Boise, and it’s embarrassing and painful to spill a glass. Next time I’ll bring a travel mug.
