Today’s blog was fueled by a glass of 2006 Terra Alta “Sexto” from Spain. The wine was introduced at a “Women, Wine and Money” event in Boise last week. It’s $26 a bottle and is called “Sexto” not for the carnal flirt but for the word “sixth” in Spanish. The wine maker added a sixth grape to the blend so decided to call it “Sexto.” The six grapes include garnacha, carignan, tempranillo, lledoner pelut noir, cabernet sauvignon, and syrah. I’m a fan of Italian and California wines, but this Spanish blend is absolutely yummy.
blog
Midlife Cabernet – Still Sipping After All These Years…
I took a small vacation from my blog titled Midlife Cabernet. OK, it was for three years, but who’s counting?
So much has happened during the past three years: I moved (for the fifth time in six years) into a wonderful home I bought on a short sale which helped ease the pain of losing a fortune on a needless McMansion in Two Rivers. My daughter had a delightful baby girl, born with Down syndrome, who has added pure joy and honest love into our lives. I met a man who is so fun and wonderful that I married him on a Greek island. My son married a splendid young woman, and I inherited two new granddaughters. I moved my mother into an assisted living facility and we all survived her broken bones and ambulance trips to the hospital. My publishing company, Mill Park Publishing, published four books: Daily Erotica, The Backyard Chicken Fight, Mother Knows Best, and Little White Dress. Mill Park Publishing also created and hosted three successful “Write by the River” events at the cabin in Garden Valley. And, I passed a milestone birthday that still has me quivering with astonishment: How in the hell did I get to be this old?
So, yes, I’ve been busy. And, just think about the vats of wine that were consumed during all those events! I’m starting this blog again – because I can. I hope to update the blog often and will focus on all the exciting fun that comes with being too old to care about silly things, such as if my socks match or if I’ve paid the electric bill. I hope you can join me on this joyful journey to Supreme After Sixty Status (SASS). (I get SO irritated at young people who refer to those over age 55 as “elderly.” We are, punks, aged to perfection!)
Wine of the Day: Menopause Merlot by Bitner Vineyards was released in 2008. I only have a few bottles left, so I’m bribing Bitner to do another release. We’ll see how that goes.
Midlife Cabernet – A Vintage, Full-bodied Blog
The power of a child! My sweet granddaughter, Mirabel Ruby, celebrated her second birthday yesterday with a festive party as four generations enjoyed brunch and mimosas prepared by her parents, singing by her cousins, and a musical program from her grandparents.
The amazing reality of this event was that 15 adults of totally diverse backgrounds and beliefs came together to celebrate this wonderful little girl. We had liberals, conservatives, agnostics, new-agers, a vegetarian, and a widow who still thinks Eisenhower is president. At least three guests own a concealed weapon permit and several others wouldn’t have a gun in the house. We represent a sample of America, and we’ll probably cancel out each other’s votes during the next presidential election.
But, we came together to sing, laugh, and celebrate the extraordinary life of a two-year-old who just last week learned to crawl. Mirabel was born with ten fingers, ten toes, and Down syndrome. And, she has the power to unite all of us. Cheers and thank you, Sweet Mirabel!
At home, to continue the celebration, I opened a 2009 Terra-Barossa Shiraz from Australia. I was hesitant to purchase the wine, mainly because I’m a Cabernet fan and the bottle had a screw top, but it was highly recommended by the Co-op in Boise. I was surprised and pleased at the rich flavor, and it tasted of spicy plums and creamy oak. This wine is good enough to go without the lovely sound of a popping cork. It’s about $20 at the Boise Co-op.
Midlife Cabernet: The Curmudgeon Phenomenon
One of the best reasons to slide gleefully down the backside of middle age is to reach that glorious oasis where I just don’t care anymore if my socks match, or if my plastic pink flamingo in the yard irritates the neighbors, or if I could braid the twig-sized hairs growing out of my chin. My life is an inviting place that reminds me of my paternal grandmother’s old rocking chair; the one with the sagging, butter-soft, leather seat and the wooden arms worn white with wear. Finally, I’m comfortable with where and who I am.
What does concern me, however, is the unexpected, occasional detour into becoming a curmudgeon. Yes, every now and then I scowl at teenagers with pants hanging below their butts. I ask others why they have holes in their ears big enough to measure serving portions of spaghetti. I audibly gasp at baristas with multiple piercings in their lips, noses, and eyebrows and angry tattoos crawling up both arms. And, I’ve been known to roll down my window and tell the gyrating rebels in the next car to turn down the heavy metal music because it’s peeling the paint from my car. They can’t hear me, of course, because they are going deaf.
I vaguely remember back in the dark ages when I was young. There were plenty of old farts telling me to “Cut your bangs,” or, “Turn down that gawd-awful music!” But, my hair didn’t resemble a mixture of spilled, day-glo paint plastered rigid with super glue. And, the music of the Beatles and the Beach Boys seems nursing-home tame compared to the jet-engine shrill of today’s harsh sounds that could be used to torture prisoners into confessing that they ate the body of Jimmy Hoffa.
Maybe it’s inevitable to turn into the image of the old lady with the purse from the 1968 television show Laugh-In. I should just go sit on a park bench and wait for an elderly man to shuffle up and offer me a Walnetto. (A favorite Laugh-In skit.) Except now, I’d probably take the Walnetto and tell him to hit the road. Because, at my age, I can say anything I want.
To assist with my age-induced transition, I enjoyed some fabulous 2009 Justin Cabernet Sauvignon from the Justin Vineyards and Winery in Paso Robles, CA. This delicious wine offers tastes of cherry, raspberry, spice and mocha with abundant tannins. I found it for around $35 at Seasons Wine Bar in Eagle. The label on the bottle contains a QR Code application that I can download to my smart phone or Ipad. Of course it does.
Midlife Cabernet – Waiting for the Prize Patrol
I recently visited my mother in her assisted living facility, and she was sitting in her wheelchair looking at a copy of ESPN Magazine.
“Studying for the Super Bowl?” I asked.
“No,” she responded. “I don’t like sports.”
I noticed the stack of magazines on her table. FORBES. MENS HEALTH. EBONY. JET. YOGA TODAY. ELLE.
“Have you been taking your medications, Mom?” I asked, wondering about her sudden interest in all things young and masculine.
“I don’t like those magazines,” she answered. “I’m waiting for my prize.”
She wheeled over to her dresser and pulled out a large envelope stuffed with “official” letters and postcards from the Office of the Sr. Vice President of PUBLISHERS CLEARING HOUSE announcing that she was in the Winners Circle! Yes, she only had a limited time to return the card with the Official Authorization Code to be eligible to collect her millions in prizes! But, the time-sensitive message was urgent! “The next step is up to you!” screamed the bold text highlighted in bright yellow. “You could be just days away from winning! Respond today!!!!!” And, of course, it wouldn’t hurt to subscribe to some of these magazines….
My mother had dutifully written notes on each and every letter: day received, amount of check enclosed, day check mailed. She already had subscribed to most of the women’s magazines, including Cooking (she doesn’t have a kitchen), and Oprah (empowerment has never been part of her lifestyle). I tallied up the orders, and she had paid for 32 magazine subscriptions, some of them until 2016. And, there was no Prize Patrol pounding on her door.
My mother is not stupid, just frail. She’s a Depression-era woman who knows the value of a penny, and thirty years ago she helped my father manage several large businesses. In her defense, I know that she grew up in a time when women took oaths to “obey,” and they believed every official-looking document they received. The evil hucksters at PCS know how to manipulate these innocent people, but the fraud they are committing against the elderly should be labeled a criminal offense.
I’m trying to get the subscriptions cancelled, but that’s almost as difficult as winning anything. I’m thinking about staging an event to have some people show up at her door with balloons and a big (worthless) check. I really want her to get a prize.
I took home some of the magazines (along with her checkbook) and opened a bottle of 2008 Catena Malbec. I found this spicy, full-bodied wine for only $22 at Seasons Wine Bar in Eagle. It pairs nicely with a copy of Fortune Magazine…..
Midlife Sex: When Your Libido Goes Limp
Hide the kids. Valentine’s Day soon will be here, so it’s time to get a glass of Cabernet and discuss midlife sex…
I used to get annoyed at sexist jokes that portrayed the unfeeling woman as hard to get and the poor man as the suffering victim begging for some action. I was just the opposite, and all my husband had to do was touch me and I sprang into action like a musical jack-in-the-box. The clown suit was optional. We had to sneak time for intimacy, which was usually interrupted because the teenagers came home with a gang of their friends. Or worse, they didn’t come home and we were up half the night calling around to find them.
But after I reached perimenopause, I lost the energy and desire to muster up any more than a goodnight kiss. Sometimes even a cursory wave was all I could do. Rearranging the furniture was more pleasurable, so who needed sex when the couch and chair were in perfect fung shei harmony?
After consulting with my doctor, she recommended a low-dose prescription of testosterone on a temporary basis. When I expressed concern about growing a beard and developing an urgent need to scratch my genitals, she assured me that I wouldn’t instantly acquire manly traits. She said that testosterone affects sex drive and is important for arousal, sexual response, lubrication, and orgasm. I took the prescription for three months and found it to be very effective. I assume that the brief use of the drug reminded my brain that “Hey. This sex stuff is fun.” I still scratched my genitals from time to time, but that was my choice.
Emotional factors can inhibit your sex drive, and you can blame your lack of desire on too much stress. Your adrenal glands make estrogen and testosterone, which are essential in creating sexual response. If you’re overstressed and exhausted, your body kicks into survival mode and your pleasure becomes secondary. Basically, your brain sends out signals that you would rather live than lust.
Adrenal fatigue is the official medical term caused by constant stress and high cortisol levels. Your adrenal glands act as control centers for many of your body’s hormones and your adrenals release sudden bursts of energy for temporary emergency use. Besides producing estrogen and testosterone, your adrenal glands make other hormones, including adrenaline and cortisol. Your body uses cortisol to convert proteins into energy. Your ancestors needed adrenaline and cortisol for immediate energy to run away from a hungry tiger, but then they rested in a cozy cave and then mated like wild animals under a jungle moon.
Now fast forward from the wilderness to your wild and hectic life. You have overloaded your body’s capacity to process adrenal hormones that were originally designed to work only as a temporary response in periodic times of tension. You have overstressed your stress regulators because your body is tensed all the time because you’re always being chased by hungry tigers in the form of your teenagers, job demands, older parents, financial worries, health problems, and issues with your assorted relationships. The resulting fatigue makes you too tired to think clearly, let alone crave a tumble between the sheets. Evidently, the occasional hour-long frantic flight from danger combined with a subsequent reprieve is better for your sex life than continuous, nail-biting anxiety.
Excerpt from Menopause Sucks. Autographed copies are available for $12 plus $5 shipping. For details, email [email protected]
Another provocative book, Daily Erotica – 366 Days of Passion, was written by four local, sassy authors. Autographed copies are available for $10 plus $5 shipping. Email [email protected]
Today’s blog was fueled by a 2009 Q Sonoma County Cabernet Sauvignon. This wine carries a flavor of oak and vanilla, and a bottle costs about $15 at Albersons.
