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Elaine Ambrose

Bestselling Author, Ventriloquist, & Humorist

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You are here: Home / Archives for motivation

motivation

Speaking of Laughter

January 27, 2016 By Elaine Ambrose

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“It’s such a busy time of year. I’ve had company for weeks! I finally took my aunt to the airport this morning, but now I’m feeling guilty. Her plane doesn’t leave until next week.”

Rim shot.

I often begin humorous speeches with that joke because it always provokes laughter from the audience. Why? First, people can identify with being busy and dealing with house guests. Second, there is an unexpected twist at the end. You can substitute aunt with mother-in-law, depending upon the strength of your marriage and assuming she’s not in the audience.

No one says, “Oh, you shouldn’t have said that!” The audience knows I’m joking, but they laugh anyway because it’s a funny scenario. After they stop laughing, I immediately add a second image.

“My sweet aunt was sick last year, so I visited her. She was in bed, and as we talked I munched on peanuts in a bowl on her nightstand. I noticed that I had eaten all the peanuts so I offered to buy more. She said, ‘Oh, Elaine, I can’t eat peanuts because they hurt my teeth. I just suck off the chocolate and put them back in the bowl.”

That story also guarantees a laugh. Why? Because the audience can see my aunt sick in bed and feels tender support for my visit. Then the silly image of her sucking off the chocolate hits their funny bone. For added emphasis, I use a southern drawl for my aunt’s voice. It’s all in great fun and causes the group to relax and prepare for my speech. Without a humorous introduction, it would take more time to connect with the listeners.

A well-timed, original joke can be the beginning of a wonderful relationship between a speaker and an audience, and between friends. Caveat: don’t read jokes, and don’t tell them if you’re not comfortable with public speaking. Rehearse the stories out loud so you get the timing and phrasing correct. A well-delivered punch line can be a golden experience as the audience reacts and instantly loves you. Conversely, a dull, lifeless and insecure presentation is painful for everyone. Make sure the joke is not on you.

Next spring I’m packing my finger puppets, best jokes and sensible shoes to travel from Boise, Idaho to Dayton, Ohio and then to Las Vegas, Nevada to speak at two energizing conferences. I’ll incorporate humor throughout my talks, and create stories and anecdotes to enhance the message. Regrettably, now I need to find new opening jokes.

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The prestigious Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop is March 31-April 2 in Dayton, Ohio at the University of Dayton where an astute professor once told his student Erma Bombeck, “You can write!” My presentation titled “Write Funny, NOW!” will include quotes from Bombeck’s material and incorporate writing prompts. I’ll also lead a workshop explaining how to turn a blog into a book. Registration for the bi-annual conference sold out in less than six hours.

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The BAM-Bloggers at Midlife Conference will be April 15-16, 2016 at the Marriott Las Vegas Resort & Spa and is the first blogging conference focusing on midlife women bloggers. The midlife blogging community, facilitated by Midlife Boulevard, asked for a place where they could get together and learn from each other and from experts. I’ll be speaking on a panel with two other humor writers. Registration remains open for this conference.

Back in Boise, I’ll present a humor writing workshop for the Idaho Writers Guild on Saturday, June 11. At all the presentations, I’ll have finger puppets, new jokes and at least one new book. Apparently, people want and need to be happy. I’ll do my part to facilitate a few chuckles and provoke boisterous laughter because there are too many grouchy people getting all the attention.

For public speaking engagements, I include my three top tips for adding humor to your life:

1. Switch off the news.
Balance your intake with funny shows, movies, books and silly friends.

2. Avoid crabby people. Hang out with those who like to laugh.

3. Practice laughter. Read daily positive, humorous affirmations and focus on all the good stories.

Laughter is good for the body and soul. And, a sense of humor provides a great way to make and keep friends. As the American Author and Humorist Mark Twain said, “Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.”

Go forth, cause laughter and enjoy the show.

 

Published on The Huffington Post December 28, 2015

Filed Under: blog Tagged With: #Erma Bombeck, #humor, #laughter, #midlife, Midlife Boulevard, motivation, speaker

How to Turn a Flat Tire into a Fulfilled Speech

July 21, 2015 By Elaine Ambrose

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Monday evening, I was scheduled to present a motivational speech to an exclusive, private club in Boise. I wiggled into my dress, gathered my notes, and sashayed to my car with 45 minutes to make a 30 minute drive. The tire was flat.

flat tire

I take pride in being independent but there are two chores I refuse to learn: how to change a tire and how to use a chainsaw. There are other people who can do those activities far better than I can. And, everyone knows I would cut off at least one appendage if I ever held anything that involved buzzing sharp edges. I buy Band-Aids in bulk because I’ve been known to slice through skin with a dull butter knife. Chainsaws are for loggers and horror movies.

I glared at the flat tire and calculated my options. My husband was at work 40 minutes away. My adult children were all on vacation. My neighbors were gone, and my town didn’t have a taxi service. I called Uber, but the nearest driver was an hour away. I called the woman who had invited me to speak and left a desperate message of apology on her voice mail. Then I called the private club and left another anxious message. By then, it was time to be at the presentation.

An important rule to know: When all else fails, try Facebook. I went online and issued a global plea for a ride. Instantly, friends responded so I took the closest one. I arrive an hour late to the event, but by then all the guests were on their second glass of wine and feeling quite forgiving and jovial. They laughed with me before my first joke, and that’s when I knew all would be okay.

I always carry finger puppets because I use them in speeches and workshops. It’s great fun to cause stuffy engineers to turn into silly schoolboys singing rounds while using finger puppets. My best gimmick is to use finger puppets to transfer hostile, negative thoughts and invite charming, positive encouragement. These cheap but powerful puppets are available in bulk at party stores, and I advise people to keep a few at their desks or in their car.

So, I stood before the group with Monster Puppet telling me in one ear that I was a loser and no one would ever ask me to speak again. Queen Puppet responded with positive affirmations that shit happens and I glow brighter than the morning sun. The banter continued until Monster Puppet ultimately was vanquished. The speech moved into my prepared remarks and ended with applause. Merriment and more drinks ensued.

I begged a ride home and made plans to contact the tire dealer. As I prepared for bed, Monster Puppet snarled that I should learn how to change a tire. Queen Puppet suddenly appeared with a chainsaw and chopped off his head. Unfortunately, my finger is cut again.

 

Filed Under: blog Tagged With: #humor, #public speaking, motivation, tires

Five Fun and (Almost) Free Things to Do

January 9, 2015 By Elaine Ambrose

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It’s already the second week of January. How are those resolutions working for you?  I made it three days without chocolate, so I’m golden for the rest of the month.

If you’re still in the “New Year, New You” mood, here are some hints for five fun, inexpensive activities to do that will improve your life. Try at least two of them before the end of the year.

ghoul

  1. Avoid negative people. You’ll never change them, so why be around them? They will suck out every ounce of energy you have and leave you a depleted shell of wasted humanity. This rule could be awkward if the offensive person is a relative, client, or neighbor, so just reduce the time you spend with them. Delete irritating, bloviating, and whining friends from your social media accounts. This experience is delightful, liberating, and perfectly legal.

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2. Plant flowers in the spring with a child. Grab a cute kid – grandchildren are perfect for this project – and take them to select some flowers, haul everything into your yard, get dirty, make a mess, laugh, and plant some petunias. If you don’t have a yard, use some inexpensive pots and potting soil in your home or plant flowers at a nearby nursing home. Invite the sweetie pie over for tea parties throughout the summer so you can watch the flowers bloom and grow forever. Hum “Edelweiss,” if necessary.

 

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3. Explore other times and places that spark your imagination. You won’t need to find your lost passport or endure airport security lines if you find a comfortable chair and a good book. Look through your collection, browse your local bookstore, or schedule a few hours at the public library. I recommend Bel Canto by Ann Patchett, Wild by Cheryl Strayed, Cold Sassy Tree by Olive Ann Burns, and All the Light You Cannot See by my friend Anthony Doerr.

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  1. Blow bubbles. Watching kids giggle while they blow bubbles is better than any entertainment on television. Bottles are inexpensive from craft stores or you can make your own solution by gently mixing ½ cup water, ½ cup dish soap, and 2 teaspoons of sugar. You’ll need to keep the wands from empty bottles, and it’s best to do this activity outside. It’s okay if you secretly do this by yourself.

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  1. Sit still and observe nature. Free: walk to a city park and sit on a bench. Some cost: drive to a nature center or the nearest scenic place. I prefer the mountains. More cost: add a bottle of wine and bring along a good friend/designated driver. Repeat these scenarios as often as possible.

These activities don’t cost much money and you don’t need to download, upload, or charge anything. The only batteries required are in your car. Simple pleasures are usually the best. Have a splendid year.

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: blog Tagged With: #children, #grandchildren, books, goals, motivation, nature, priorities

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