Elaine Ambrose

Bestselling Author, Ventriloquist, & Humorist

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Write from the Heart – A Workshop for the Senses

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My interactive workshop titled “Write from the Heart” explores how to use emotions and senses to inspire your writing. Musical selections with prompts guide writers through various stages of their life. Participants can volunteer to read their work to the group.

The workshop also includes items to feel, see, smell, and touch. The goal of the two-hour workshop is for writers to follow their natural senses to create authentic paragraphs on a variety of subjects. All workshop attendees receive journals, pens, books, and heart-healthy snacks.

The February workshop was sponsored by Tesoro Valle Gifts in Eagle, and fees were $25. Future workshops will be announced soon.

Sense of Touch
Sense of Taste
Sense of Smell
Writing from the heart…

 

Let’s Celebrate My Ejection Fraction!

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I’m so excited to be normal! Three years ago, an echocardiogram revealed my heart ejection fraction was registered at 30%, indicating serious heart failure. Another procedure this week revealed the ejection fraction had improved to 60%, a normal percentage. I’ve never been so happy to receive a score of 60%.

Three Years to Become Normal

I had a heart attack in June of 2021, and cardiologists at Idaho Cardiology Associates at St. Luke’s diagnosed cardiomyopathy heart disease and chronic heart failure with left bundle branch block and a reduced ejection fraction of 30 percent. I had a broken heart, but I was too weak to get my affairs in order. Survival was the only option.

After two surgeries, a defibrillator was installed beneath my collarbone. Until then, I didn’t take any medical subscriptions and suddenly I had eight pill bottles in my daily routine. I changed my diet to reduce salt and sugar, joined a gym, started walking, and canceled my writing workshops and travels. In March, I started the St. Luke’s Cardiovascular Rehabilitation Program and “graduated” in June.

Each participant wore an electronic monitor and three electrodes to trace heart activity on various exercise equipment and during weight-lifting assignments.

In addition to exercise routines three times a week, the program offered nutrition advice with menus and sample meals. Each participant met with various staff members to discuss mental and physical health. The staff, under the direction of Nurse Leigh McClure, was excellent, and the results were positive. All my lab values improved: I lowered total cholesterol from 187 to 145 and decreased the chance of having diabetes. I lost eight pounds, but I’m still chubby.

The program encouraged lifestyle changes and improvements to stabilize the progression of cardiovascular disease. (I wasn’t totally gallant because I continued to enjoy red wine.)

Ejection Fraction measures the heart’s ability to pump oxygen-rich blood. When oxygen isn’t pumped naturally throughout the body, the brain becomes confused (more than normal), climbing four steps seems like a month-long mountain excursion, and gasping for breath becomes priority. A few times, I saw my life pass before my eyes, and it wasn’t pretty. I needed to stay alive to fix a few problems.

EJECTION FRACTION

June 2021 – 30% June 2023 – 43% June 2024 – 60%
Heart Failure Low Function, Weak Heart Normal

LAB VALUES                                 August 2023                                   June 2024

*Total Cholesterol 187 145 Keep below 200
Triglycerides 136 127 Fat in blood
HDL 50 53.1 Good cholesterol
*LDL 110 67 Bad cholesterol
HbA1c% 6.4 6.2 Diabetes is above 6.5
Blood Pressure 143/85 104/64

Friends and Family Provided Therapy

Support from family and friends was additional medicine. I received encouragement from friends on Social Media as I prepared for surgery. My patient husband provided TLC at home, and my son drove me to doctor’s appointments. I tried to follow the new realities of living with cardiomyopathy, and my heart began to heal. I was grateful for three more years.

It was difficult curtailing or deleting previous activities I had enjoyed. I canceled a writing workshop last summer due to physical exhaustion, and my lack of breath caused me to relinquish a major role I had in a play this spring with the Eagle Theatre Company. Once an avid traveler, I preferred the pleasant resort on my patio. I’ve eliminated some unhealthy foods and added more fresh vegetables, but I just can’t eat tofu. It’s nasty.

My heart beat in a steady rhythm as I wrote this message. I smiled.

 

 

Finding Rhythm: 80 Songs in 80 Days

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I was diagnosed with cardiomyopathy heart disease after suffering a heart attack in June. Surgery in July plus several prescribed medications have improved the function of my heart, but I continue to experience shortness of breath. I can’t walk or talk very long, and I’ve had to cancel speaking gigs and postpone a few scheduled webinars for my writing workshops. I can do one thing: play piano.

 

I started playing piano music to stimulate regular heartbeats and to share music. My elaborate recording studio consists of my iPad on a stool on a bench. I played the first song on August 1 and posted it to my Facebook account.

Requests started to come, and I kept playing. Most of the songs were my favorites, but there were a few new ones: I had never heard “One Little Candle,” but now I love the song. The most difficult requests to play were “Stairway to Heaven,” “You Must Love Me,” and “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

I wrote a synopsis for each request and enjoyed using various props, artwork, and outfits to go with each song. My hair changed color three times since August, going from brunette to blonde to “pewter.” Pewter sounds so much better than “gray.”

 

As I played each song, I imagined the person sitting in my piano room and listening to me play the requested song. I’m alone most of the time, so the experience was welcomed. My breathing has improved with the regular practicing and playing, and my weak heart is healing and full of joy.

I’m taking a break after playing 80 songs in 80 days. I’ll play and post more songs as Christmas gets closer. Who can resist some festive holiday music? I intend to keep the music playing as long as possible and share the healing harmony.

Here is the list of 80 songs:

August 1 – “If I Loved You”

August 2 – “His Eye Is On the Sparrow”

August 3 – “Born Free”

August 5 – “Hallelujah Chorus”

August 6 – “Moonlight Sonata”

August 10 – “Danny Boy”

August 11 – “Ode to Joy”

August 12 – “The Yellow Rose of Texas”

August 13 – “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus”

August 14 – “River Flows in You”

August 15 – “The Old Rugged Cross”

August 16 – “Bushel and a Peck”

August 17 – “Unchained Melody”

August 18 – “God Bless the USA”

August 19 – “Waltz Across Texas”

August 20 – “In the Garden”

August 21 – “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”

August 21 – “Morning has Broken”

August 22 – “How Great Thou Art”

August 23 – “You’ve Got a Friend”

August 24 – “When Blue Moon Turns to Gold Again”

August 25 – “What a Wonderful World”

August 26 – “Let it Be”

August 27 – “The Marine’s Hymn”

August 28 – “Blessed Assurance”

August 29 – “You’ll Never Walk Alone”

August 30 – “The Entertainer”

August 31 – “Stairway to Heaven”

September 1 – “The Highwayman”

September 2 – “It is Well with my Soul”

September 3 – “For You”

September 4 – “Walk Away Renee”

September 5 – “All Things Bright and Beautiful”

September 6 – “Shallow”

September 7 – “Golden Slumbers”

September 8 – “Happy Birthday” (Not counted in total)

September 8 – “Moon River”

September 9 – “Somewhere Out There”

September 10 – “Moonlight in Vermont”

September 11 – “Watermark”

September 12 – “What a Friend We Have in Jesus”

September 13 – Theme Song from “The Midnight Cowboy”

September 14 – “The Falling Leaves”

September 15 – “The 12th of Never”

September 16 – “You Must Love Me”

September 17 – “The Star-Spangled Banner”

September 18 – “Could it Be Magic?”

September 19 – “Time in a Bottle”

September 20- “Last Date”

September 21 – “Here We Have Idaho”

September 22 – “Tapestry”

September 23 – “In the Mood”

September 24 – Theme Song from “The Summer of ‘42”

September 25 – “One Little Candle”

September 26 – “Bringing in the Sheaves”

September 27 – “Sittin’ On the Dock of the Bay”

September 28 – “Danger Zone”

September 29 – “Piano Man”

September 30 – “Take My Breath Away”

October 1 – “Battle Hymn of the Republic”

October 2 – “As Time Goes By”

October 3 – “Amazing Grace”

October 4 – “A Woman in Love”

October 5 – “Born to be Wild”

October 6 – “Some Enchanted Evening”

October 7 – “Nocturne” from “Secret Garden”

October 8 – “In the Garden”

October 9 – “I Dreamed a Dream”

October 10 – “His Eye Is on the Sparrow”

October 11 – “Fields of Gold”

October 12 – “Berceuse”

October 13 – “In the Arms of the Angel”

October 14 – “Mrs. Brown, You’ve Got a Lovely Daughter”

October 15 – “I Talk to the Trees”

October 16 – “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah”

October 17 – “He’s Got the Whole World”

October 18 – “Bohemian Rhapsody”

October 19 – “The Enchanted Garden”

October 20 – “The Music of the Night”

October 21 – “You’re My Home”

October 22 – “All I Ask of You”

When the Soloist Can’t Sing

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Singing at my cousin’s wedding with my best peasant dress, a guitar from Sears, and hair teased enough to hide packages of candy.

During my twenties and thirties, I sang at weddings, funerals, and assorted karaoke events with equal enthusiasm. My most requested song was “The Lord’s Prayer,” and I finessed the perfect ending:

The last line of the song is, For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever. Amen. I sang the words in a crescendo until I reached the high note on the second syllable of “forever” and held the note long and loud until the audience squirmed. Then using the same breath, I slid down the scale to hit the note on the third syllable, saying “vah” instead of the hard “r” sound. I took a breath and sang “Amen” using vibrato with the passion of a celestial choir.

My imaginary celestial choir.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I can’t do that anymore.


I was diagnosed with cardiomyopathy heart disease after a heart attack in June resulted in an echocardiogram followed with angiogram surgery in July. I’m taking eight medications, but I still can’t catch my breath, so a myocardial MRI is scheduled in a few weeks. Because of my broken heart, I can’t sing four words without stopping.

I loved to sing. At the University of Idaho, I was selected for the Jazz Choir and the Vandaleer Concert Choir. In 1971, the Vandaleers toured Europe and sang in old cathedrals in six countries. Most of the students had never been out of the USA, and a few hadn’t left the state. When the airplane took off from Heathrow Airport in London to return home, I began sobbing and couldn’t stop. The adventure changed my life, and my goal was to travel the world with a song in my heart.

I was fortunate to travel through the next few decades, and I kept singing. When my two children were born, my repertoire included favorite lullabies such as “I Love You a Bushel and a Peck” and “Momma’s Gonna Buy You a Mocking Bird.” I made up several songs, and their favorites were “Teeny Tiny Baby Boo” and “Two Kids on My Lap.” I sang around the house, and my five-year-old son would sing along with me for part of the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel’s Messiah.

And the glory, the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all nations shall see it together: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.

Because I played and sang the soundtrack from “Les Miserables” so many times, my daughter could sing the entire score by the time she was 11 years old. The touring company was years away from traveling to Idaho, so I took her to Chicago to see a live performance. That was the first of many journeys to see various musical productions.

Over the last few years, my singing was limited to lullabies with my grandchildren. I also sang in the shower and when driving alone. I couldn’t reach the high notes but managed to fake the melodies. The heart attack has taken away an important part of my life, and I don’t know if I’ll ever sing again.

To keep the music playing, I started to play songs on the piano and asked for requests on my Facebook account. So far, I’ve played more than 25 requests, adding costumes and decorations for each song. Requests range from patriotic to  spiritual to silly to entertaining. I believe I’m helping to heal my broken heart by giving music to others. This is a harmonious strategy to keep my heart beating in rhythm while sharing songs. And the people said, “Amen,” with vibrato.

Hymns are the most requested songs.
Playing “The Entertainer” because I am.
Playing requests for patriotic songs.
Playing “I Love You a Bushel and a Peck” for the kids and grandkids.

 

My Heart Hurts

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I appreciate this cartoon by theawkwardyeti.com because my brain keeps trying to make my heart function at full capacity, but it’s too weary. I’ve have been diagnosed with Non-Ischemic Cardiomyopathy heart disease exacerbated by Occipital Neuralgia migraine headaches with a nasty helping of Takotsubo Cardiomyopathy, literally a broken heart. According to Johns Hopkins Medicine,

Broken Heart Syndrome can be life-threatening. In some cases, it can cause severe heart muscle weakness resulting in:

I appreciate modern medicine and the fine people at St. Luke’s Idaho Cardiology Associates. After my successful angiogram surgery last week, my cardiologist and I have devised a healthy, positive plan for my weak and damaged heart. I’m taking eight medications, eating a healthy diet, and doing light exercise. I’m finding humorous cartoons and articles about heart disease. I’ve always known laughter is the best medicine.

I also appreciate the many friends and family members who continue to offer prayers and encouragement, and I intend to return the favor with authentic compassion. I’ll be around for a few more years to irritate, amuse, and love all of them. Stress is not welcome in my heart or home, and certain people who continue to shun me can wallow in mud and eat worms.

For now, it’s one day at a time. Just give me a few more minutes…

My Broken Heart

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Echocardiogram Machine

I had a heart attack during the night after giving a presentation at a writer’s retreat in Mexico. I didn’t want to go to a hospital in a foreign country, so I contacted the airlines and requested a wheelchair for the journey to Idaho. On the positive side, a wheelchair makes it a breeze to get through U.S. Customs and to be first onto the airplane.  Struggling for breath, I maneuvered my carry-on suitcase to the nearest chair and fell into it, panting for air. One thought repeated through my mind: Get home.

My favorite wheelchair pusher was in the Los Angeles airport. My guardian angel appeared disguised as a gregarious, Black woman named Diamond. She assisted me into the chair and eased my distress with funny stories as she negotiated the crowds. I finally could breathe without gasping and asked her if she had been a race car driver.

“Oh honey, no,” she said with a laugh. “I’ve been doing this for 30 years. You wouldn’t believe the people I have guided through these corridors. Lots of famous people. Are you famous?”

I smiled. “More like infamous,” I replied. I explained how I was returning from Todos Santos, Mexico after presenting a workshop at a writer’s retreat.

“I want to write a book!” she exclaimed as she careened around a corner to the gate. “I have tons of stories!”

I encouraged her to find free online writing courses, write every night, and compile her memories into short stories. As she pushed my chair down the ramp to the plane, she promised to send me a copy of her future book. I thanked Diamond and hoped I’d be alive to read it.

Taking My Breath Away
My breathing problems began months earlier. I ignored the loss of breath and low energy, believing the problems would go away. They didn’t. Finally, on May 25 I had an EKG, and my doctor identified a “left bundle branch block,” meaning there was a blockage on the left side of my heart. The condition indicated heart disease. That diagnosis wasn’t on my agenda.

She referred me to a cardiologist and warned it could take months to get an appointment. I got on the phone with the determination of a woman who didn’t want to die during the summer. The stars were aligned, the doctor at St. Luke’s Idaho Cardiology Associates had a cancellation, and I secured an appointment to see him on June 3. The cardiologist reviewed the EKG and ordered comprehensive blood work, a complete transthoracic echocardiogram, and a Nuclear Lexiscan stress test. The Nuclear Lexiscan test injects radioactive dye into the blood, and a camera detects damage to the heart and blocked arteries. The four-hour procedures were scheduled for June 29, only five weeks after the initial EKG. The cardiologist gave me permission to attend the writer’s retreat in Mexico but with a stern warning to avoid stress. I laughed.

On June 29, I was ushered into a room with Teresa, the medical technician who would perform the echocardiogram. I watched the monitor as she applied a gel to my chest and moved a tool called a transducer. I immediately admired and appreciated my heart. There it was, pumping as best it could. The average heart beats more than 100,000 times in one day, about 35 million times in a year. My heart was the most consistent part of my entire life. I regretted not taking better care of my heart health.

After an hour, Teresa called for an IV to be inserted in my arm so she could take more tests. Then she called for the cardiologist. I suspected something was wrong.

“Keep beating,” I silently begged my heart. “I need ten more years.”

The cardiologist appeared after reviewing the echocardiogram. “We’re cancelled the three-hour Nuclear Lexiscan test,” he said. “Your heart is too weak.”

I had failed the heart test.

Barbara Hershey and Bette Midler in Beaches

I’d Rather Play Bette Midler’s Role in Beaches
He explained that my heart only was working at 70 percent because of a damaged left ventricle. I had cardiomyopathy; a disease similar to what killed Barbara Hershey’s character in the movie Beaches. I’d rather have played Bette Midler’s role.

He prescribed several medications and scheduled a return visit for July 22. Depending on the prognosis, I could be cleared for the Nuclear Lexiscan test. After that, a pacemaker could be installed to regulate the flow of blood. The next scenario would be open heart surgery. I was way too young for all those medical procedures, but I knew heart disease was the #1 killer of women. I wanted to live.

What causes heart damage?
Smoking – I have never smoked, not even during the 70s in college when everyone was smoking pot. I wanted to retain all my brain cells.

Alcohol – I lamented my proclivity to prefer wine over workouts. Four days ago, I changed to sparkling water in a wine glass.

Diet – More veggies for me.

Exercise – I had exercised by carrying emotional baggage. That will end, and now I have a set schedule to exercise every day.

Age and Heredity – Thanks, Dad and Mom! However, I’ve enjoyed 69 splendid years.

Stress – What, me worry? It’s been a stressful year. We moved in January, I tore ligaments in my leg in February, performed a writing webinar on Zoom in March, had a brain MRI for acute headaches in April, and appeared twice in District Court in May to appeal a cruel and undeserved Protection Order against me. The judge terminated the order, but the ordeal emotionally broke my heart. The writing workshop in Mexico was in June. All those issues contributed to copious quantities of stress.


This week, I’ve had fun clearing my calendar, postponing appointments, and canceling workshops, but I intend to appear in a live comedy show for a women’s conference in October. Until then, my day will focus on staying alive and starting a (short) walking routine. My goal is to walk away from painful, stressful situations and walk toward better health. I have a broken heart. I might not be able to mend it, but I can tend it.